Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Are Your Questions Helping or Hurting You?

Pay attention and be aware of the type of questions that you find yourself using.

The questions that you ask yourself can either be helpful or detrimental.

It is important to focus on asking helping questions.

It is unfortunate that the majority of people unwittingly ask themselves questions that keep them stuck in life’s challenges. They ask themselves questions that dwell on the problem, lay blame and reinforce negatives. I term them ‘Stuck’ questions because they don’t allow you to move forward and overcome the challenges.

Have you ever asked yourself these types of questions?

“Why does this always happen to me?”
“Why can’t I do anything right?”
“What is wrong with me?”
“Who is to blame for this?”
“Why doesn’t anybody like me?”

I’m sure you have. We are all guilty of asking ourselves these types of questions. The problem occurs for us when we spend most of our time asking these types of questions. You really do not want the answers to these questions. The answers reinforce negatives that can drive you into despair, inactivity and more failure. They can also lead you to feel upset, depressed and resentful and they can significantly diminish your self-image, self-worth, self-belief and self-confidence.

Wouldn’t it be better if you asked questions that focused on providing solutions and that were productive and positive in nature? If you are not happy with aspects of your life or are encountering problems ask yourself questions that stimulate a positive intention to take action towards positive change. I term them ‘Responsible’ questions because they cause you to take responsibility for the situation. These questions will help you open up to new possibilities and opportunities that can enhance your life and allow you to take control. Ask yourself more of this mode of questions and you will see the positive difference that it will make in your life.

“How can I solve this?”
“What can I learn from this?”
“Who can I speak to for help?”
“What could I do to improve in this area of my life?”
“How can I overcome this challenge?”

So I suggest that you start consciously developing a habit of asking yourself ‘Responsible’ questions that will assist you in achieving the outcomes you desire in your life.
Remember, the questions that you are asking yourself will direct the results that are occurring in your life, as questions have a powerful influence in determining our behaviour.

My role as a Life Management & Success Coach is to assist my clients to ask questions that will empower them to take control of their lives and achieve great results and success. If you feel you need help in this area I am happy to be of assistance.

Author: Steve Decker – Life Management & Success Coach

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